In the Blue

I traveled up to Alaska earlier this summer and since then, I’ve been trying to figure out how to put my thoughts and emotions into words. I still don’t know what to say. I think that’s because the trip was an overwhelming emotional experience that I wasn’t prepared for.

In many ways I’m still not prepared to write this post and don’t know if I ever will be. I’ve started to write this over a dozen times, started crying twice more, because of a single moment on that trip. A single sound that lasted no more than 5 seconds at most and that 5 seconds changed the trajectory of my soul. I’ve had experiences in my life before that I thought were life changing, and in many ways, they were, but I’ve never experienced this before. It was instant connection with something greater than me, older than me, with a story, with life buried below ice a few hundred to tens of thousands of years old. It was a sound that to this day brings me to tears, makes me wonder, and crushes my soul all at the same time.

Let’s start out with the fun part, the itinerary! I made some big plans with ice swimming (you’ll know sooner than later), it involves glaciers, discovery, science, conservation, animals, and everything great about good old icy swimming! To prepare, I went to Alaksa with Dan McComb, producer of Ice Mermaid: Cold Resolve, and Sean McGrath, producer and cinematographer with Stone Room Films, to explore Alaska, get my body acclimatized early to the cold, learn about the effects of climate change on the ocean, ice, and aquatic life, as well as explore swimming with glaciers, something that we don’t have the ability to easily do here in Washington. We talked to many experts and learned a lot about glaciers and the impacts of melting ice due to climate change, something I admittedly knew very little about.

Here’s what we did and were we went:

Day 1 / Arrival: Flew into Anchorage and got settled into our accommodations. Planned travel times for the week, reviewed our itineraries, where we wanted to go, what we wanted to see, what commitments we already made, and if we had extra time, what sights we wanted to try to squeeze in. I also met up with some friends for dinner at Anchorage’s popular pizza joint, the Moose’s Tooth.

Day 2 / Alaska SeaLife Center and Byron Glacier: Rented a car (for more flexibility) and drove to Seward for a private tour of the Alaska SeaLife Center, were I absolutely fell in love with one of their huge stellar sea lions! We spoke to some of their science experts on the research they are doing, centering around loss of sea ice, climate change, and the effects on the ocean ecosystem. We also did a small hike at Byron Glacier to admire the melting snow and ice, learn about search and rescue (unfortunately there was a crevasse search w/o confirmation of status on the ice field – hopefully if someone did fall down there they ended up okay), and take an ice bath in the glacier water.

Day 3 / Kenai Fjords National Park: Got breakfast and coffee at Fire Island Rustic Bake Shop that and That Feeling Co for coffee, both a must-stop if you’re in Anchorage. We traveled down to Seward again for an unforgettable experience on the water with Alaska Saltwater Tours in the Kenai Fjords National Park. We literally saw it all from seals to sea lions, a sea otter eating a giant red octopus, a pod of humpback whales circle hunting, and more. It was so phenomenal; I couldn’t have expected anything like it! Once we got out to Holgate Glacier, I hopped in for a swim. My first glacier swim was a really cool experience, and I felt lucky to have the opportunity to swim in such a cool place. We wrapped up the day with fish tacos at Breeze Inn and transferred to our second accommodation at Moose Pass.

Day 4 / Exit Glacier and Kenai Mountains – Turnagain Arm National Heritage Area: We did some glacier touring and hiking around Exit Glacier and Harding Ice Field, both of which were stunning until you read about how much the glaciers had receded, which was very sad, and it was this moment I really started to understand the impact now that I could see it. We spent time with the wildflowers at Kenai Mountains – Turnagain Arm National Heritage Area, and wow, was it beautiful. What was intended to be a short picture spot, turned into a few hours of taking everything in.

Day 5 / Knik Glacier: We headed up to Palmer to one of the most exciting places I’ve been, Knik Glacier with Knik Glacier Tours. We took an off-road, motor boat, hike-in tour to get to Knik Glacier and it definitely didn’t disappoint. Knik Glacier was breathtakingly beautiful and was the site of my coldest swim yet, 0.5C…. maybe less. Yes, I swam and it was freezing, literally, with many new sensations and learnings about the water, cold, and swimming.

But it was so much more than that….

About the 5 seconds that changed my course of existence

We will return to the itinerary in a moment, but let’s first talk about Knik Glacier. The swim was the easiest part and what I could make the most sense of because I knew how to swim. That’s where what I knew stopped and something else took over. The water felt different. The surroundings were a completely new, different, and challenging environment that was big, small, and intimate all at the same time. After my swim, I had some time for lunch and then I took a short walk alone to have some 1:1 time with the glacier and the environment. This was a new body of water I had met, a new relationship that didn’t have the level of trust and connection the same way I have with the ocean. I wanted to speak to the glacier and give thanks for protecting me, keeping me safe, and allowing me passage through Her ancient waterway.

While I was on that hill talking and taking moments to listen to the glacier, listen to the silence and Her own way of speaking, I heard it. A sound, a sound that I had never heard before. It sounded similar to the whales on the hydrophone in the sea. It lasted only a moment, but it was deafening. I instantly started to cry, I couldn’t breathe. That sound pierced me like nothing has before. That sound entered my soul and shifted everything I thought I had believed in that day. The ice is alive and though I’m learning all I can and pursuing the path of figuring out what it was I heard, what I do know is no amount of science can explain the origin of that sound.

I spent the entire trip thinking about it, trying not to cry. I spent the entire drive back to Anchorage thinking about it, trying not to cry. Later that evening I was fortunate enough to talk with artist, scientist, back-country guide, climate leader, glacier baker extraordinaire, Rose McAdoo. We talked about everything under the sun, but when I started to describe the sound, I just started crying. I couldn’t help the emotions, didn’t know where they were coming from, and still don’t as I’m starting to cry typing this. She can only guess at what the sound was since she wasn’t there, but believes there is more to the ice that what we see.

Science by Dr. Google said the sound was likely the movement of water under the glacier. That’s the simple answer, but I believe it’s rooted in something deeper. There’s not a day that has gone by I don’t think about it and well up with tears. That moment changed the core of my being. I’m forever grateful for having a place on this earth and a relationship with water, all of which I’m sure all lead to that moment, to that sound.

Between the silence of the vast open and listening to the origin of water by way of ice melt, the glacier spoke to me, like a voice from the past sharing part of their story. It changed me as a person, it changed my soul, and I know was the start of something new. What? I don’t know, but I’ll take this path blindly wherever it goes.

P.S. We finally saw a moose this day too!

Whew… that was heavy. Let’s get back to the fun stuff… back to the itinerary!

Day 6 / Departure to Juneau and Sitka: We got up early, headed to the airport, and went our separate ways. The boys headed back to Seattle, I went to Juneau for a stopover and then headed on to Sitka for some more swim fun!

Days 7-14 / Change Your Latitude: Several years ago I write another blog post about the Change Your Latitude swim in Sitka, AK. Well, nothing had changed! It is still the most fun swim I’ve ever done! There are events from 1K to 10K, it’s come as your are, have fun, enjoy Sitka, the people, the food, the hiking, the comradery, and the most fun – the adventure swims! I met new Triple Crown Friends, ate the most amazing pizza… 3 times that week (maybe 4 – I don’t know, I can’t remember), experienced new land adventures, new swim adventures, and had some old favorites too at the Chaichei Islands in Sitka Sound. Race day was perfect. I still couldn’t swim a 10K, but I brought my fins and snorkel for a 10K snorkel sesh that was just as fun (and embarrassingly not that much slower than my 10K swim). Should you go? Yes! Read my previous blog post, feel free to ask me questions, and just register. You absolutely won’t regret it!

Day 15 / Travel Back to Seattle: Coming home was tough, I felt like I had lived a whole life up there in Alaska. I was changed, but back to the grindstone it was, but not for long…

Backpacking to Lake Ann and Lower Curtis Glacier

A week later I was fortunately enough to accompany leading glaciologist, Mauri Pelto with the North Cascade Glacier Climate Project, art director, Jill Pelto, and several others, on a backpacking trip to Lake Ann and Lower Curtis Glacier on Mount Shuksan. It was fascinating hearing the history of glacial melting directly from the scientists leading who have been collecting data and documenting impact of climate change on these glaciers since 1983. I learned a lot about the science behind documenting climate change impact as well as the importance of communicating science and data through different mediums, like art. Jill and the other artists we backpacked with create art based on glacial recede to raise awareness about the impacts of climate change.

It was eye opening to me because it was the first trip I’ve done where I felt like I was doing more than swimming and learning about the water and my surroundings, I was learning about something important. I could see how what I was doing with sports could have a greater impact through communicating environmental change to a different audience. Swimming Lake Ann was amazing, but honestly, this trip was all about connecting with the ice and learning how to protect it.

In comes Ice Mermaid 2…. We are starting and it’s a project that will be focused on some very icy swims and some very important conservation topics that I’m hoping will start conversation. Stay tuned for something special!